There are moments when a song you’ve heard many times before suddenly speaks to you in a new way. Earlier this week, my Ipod ‘accidentally’ flipped to a song by Alison Krauss called “Get Me Through December.”
The first time I heard this song was just before the first Christmas season without my sister, who had died earlier that year of cancer. I had spent 11 months on a downhill trajectory, and by that December, I was praying for something, anything, to get me through. At that time, the song spoke to me of my sadness; the hopeful part, the desire to start again that is the essence of the song, did not even resonate. I listened to the song over and over, focusing mainly on the first stanza, which speaks of preparing for the long winter ahead, and the coldness of loss. The stanza ends with the line, “Faith can move mountains, of that I am sure…just get me through December, so I can start again.” At that point I was not sure about faith, or about wanting to start again. It was Christmas, and the belief that I was supposed to be happy and joyful made me feel guilt on top of the deep sadness. I just wanted December, and the Christmas season, to be over.
This week when I heard the song again, I understood that it is about the profound hope that can come after a long winter of pain. This past year has been a challenging one for many, and for us as a nation. I wonder how many are struggling through the holiday season with false gaiety, just hoping to make it through December. To start again.
Listening to the song this time, the second stanza stood out in bold relief: “No divine purpose brings freedom from sin, and peace is a gift that must come from within.” Good intentions are not enough, and peace comes from an inner knowing, an understanding of who we really are. The song reminded me of something I had forgotten in the aftermath of my sister’s death: that we must go within, and that perhaps it is even more important to do so when we face crisis, and during this hectic season. I’ve been listening to it over and over as a form of meditation on faith, the season and hope. The beauty of the melody, the piano and violin instrumentals, and especially Alison Krauss’s ethereal voice, clear as a winter sky….the song takes you from the depths of loss to hope, and finally, sets the heart soaring. It then brings the listener down to earth gently, ready to start again.
Beautiful commentary, Beth! Hoping you have a wonderful Christmas filled with God's hope and light. Give Paul a big hug from us! Tony, Sheila and Taryn Tennaro
Beth, Thank you for sharing that beautiful song. Love Alison Krauss!!!!! I lost my mom this year and can totally relate to "making it through Christmas". The reality of not having any parents now is an unusual feeling. I am trying to hold on to the good feelings of Christmas that my parents instilled in me. I hung my moms beautiful, old ornaments on the tree with extra care this year. Another reminder of the fragility of life. For a brief moment my hand looked like hers as I adjusted each one. My husband and beautiful daughter will help me through. We will celebrate their lives in the best way possible this Christmas- remembering the good times! Love to you! Felicia
It is so true! True transformation can only occur by going inside and connecting to Source. Alison Krauss's voice is beautiful indeed. We listened to it over and over. Merry Christmas and a very peaceful 2010 to all.~Lisa Hynes-Rosenfeld
Beth, I do not know you, but I know the pain in which you describe. Your writing touched me deeply and brought to mind this passage.
Romans chpt 5 says :
….."also rejoice in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perserverence; perseverence, character; and character, hope. And hope does not disappoint us, because God has poured out his love into our hearts by the Holy Spirit, whom he has given us."
May God bless you this Holiday season.
thank you for commentary, beth .. i whole heartedly agree .. it's especially important that we reach out when we need assistance .. so that those that love you can also learn about the authentic cycle of giving + receiving love + support. i think women strive to accomplish so much and be emotionally strong simultaneously .. often taking on more than we should as if we need to prove some thing to some one .. i know .. i was that women .. mother .. daughter .. boss .. until i was diagnosed with breast "canswer" .. that journey has transformed me .. and though it can be a challenging time .. it was the "answer" to many questions .. divine purpose .. peace .. intention .. so perhaps .. as you suggest .. crisis is the starting point .. to the transformation that can bring blessings to our experience.
thank you for sharing your transformation .. it helps us all to grow .. wishing you a wonderful new year filled with the magic of love!
Beth, I think of her often. I loved her like she was my sister. She helped me get through an imposible time when my angel was diagnosised and we lost her to cancer. The holidays are hard, but like you wrote……."We must go within." Happy Holidays! Love ya all………..Staci